Thursday, January 8, 2015

Recap/Review: Gotham Girls "Trick or Trick" Parts 1 & 2

Ladies, gentlemen, anonymous internet dwellers, it's time for Gotham Girls' big holiday special! A special so nice, they split it into two parts! For some odd reason. You'll see when we get there. Let's begin.

Happy Halloween! And only three months late.
This time, there's a new pre-load game. Awesome! Let's see what it is.

Screw this noise. Does anyone actually like slider puzzles?
The first part of this webisode opens with Harley and Ivy in their shared apartment.

What? You want me to make a joke about how they're probably lesbians? I'm not going to. For multiple reasons.

A. Saying "Hey! Two chicks! They must be gay for each other!" not only isn't funny, but isn't really a joke because...
B. They are lesbians. Paul Dini basically said as much several times over the years.
C. Homosexuals are not a punchline in and of themselves. They're not here and queer to be laughed at.

Knowing is half the battle.
I only bring all this up to pad out this Recap because of the crude animation. It honestly looks like a crappy fan-made animation. And because of that, a small part of my mind keeps expecting it to break out into girl-on-girl porn. Because that's what the internet's for.

But instead of crudely animated wanton sex, our couple is acting like an actual couple. They're just lounging around. Ivy is taking this opportunity to water her plants while Harley continually sighs louder and louder to hint that she's bored. Like I said, acting like an actual couple.

Harley: "It's Halloween. We should be out on the town, not veg-ing it up at home...."

Hah, puns.

Ivy says she doesn't want to go out because this is the night all the amateur costumed nuts are out. She and Harley are professional costumed nuts. Still, Harley reminisces about all those crimes that she and the Joker used to commit on Halloween, and this starts the tears a-going. To cheer her up, Ivy decides that it's time for her Halloween present. It's a life-size "Real Villain" of the Joker.'s a sex doll. And this is an official (if sucky) entry into the DC Animated Universe. This is freakin' canon.

So... this.
 Oh, crap, I take back what I said earlier. We might actually see crudely animated sex. I'm kidding, of course. We will neither see that nor an official onscreen confirmation of Harley and Ivy's relationship in this series. The Gotham Girls webseries will never do anything to further LGBT rights. If it does, I'll recap and review an episode of My Little Pony.

...does anyone else hear ominous thunder? Must be my imagination.

Anyway, the gift is everything Harley ever wanted. Probably because it's a boyfriend that won't electrocute her with a joy buzzer every time she leaves toothpaste in the sink. But she didn't get Ivy anything, so she heads out to search for the perfect gift.

She heads to a Gotham storefront and sees several options in the window. A Ming vase, a moose head, SCUBA gear, and a diamond necklace. This is the interactive portion of the episode. Oh goody. The vase is a no because Ivy prefers live flowers, clicking on the moose head results in a glimpse into Harley's psyche....

Read into this what you will.
...the SCUBA gear results in a picture of Ivy wearing it, and the diamond necklace continues the plot.

Harley smashes open the window and nabs the diamond.

Harley: "Yes! This is perfect! Still gotta find something for Red, though."

Okay, I'll admit that I laughed at that.

Suddenly, Batgirl walks down a neighboring street, giving Harley an idea...

To be continued!

And now, the continuation.

Part 2 begins by showing everything in the previous part after Harley opens her gift. Because padding.

Anyway, Harley Quinn hides as Batgirl walks right past the burgled store, which should be a red flag in and of itself. After some Scooby-Doo-ish chasing in and out of doors and alleyways, Harley manages to catch up to Batgirl, who compliments her Harley Quinn outfit. Harley responds with a boxing glove to the face.

We then cut back to their hideout, as Harley presents Batgirl to Ivy all tied up with a bow over her mouth.

That sentence makes me feel like I'm watching dirty fanfic.
But Ivy's not entirely thrilled with her gift. Ivy removes Batgirl's gag, and she says "Ow!" in a very manly voice. She reaches over and rips off Batgirl's mask... And also her face. Because her face was also a mask. Underneath that mask is a dude.

Harley: "Who'da thought? Batgirl? A guy?"

Way to miss the point, Harley.

He is way too into this, considering the situation.
As it turns out, Harley found him at a Batgirl costume contest. And if you click on the other cosplayers, you can find out which one's the real Batgirl! It's completely pointless. All you get for guessing correctly is her saying that she's Batgirl.

Far right. Final answer.
Why did this need to be split into two parts? It didn't. But it was probably split up to accommodate people with slower connections in ye days of dial-up. Hence all the padding necessary to make this thing two parts.

The animation's terrible, the plot is "meh." What else am I going to say about this? It's not much of a Halloween special? The sex doll bit is weird?

This wasn't as bottom-of-the-barrel as the first one, but it wasn't too good. It's more odd than anything Next time, it's Paul Dini doing what Paul Din always does. See you then.

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