Wednesday, April 30, 2014

Recap: Avengers EMH (Micro-Episode 4) "HYDRA Lives"

And now, Micro-Episode 4, sequel to Micro-Episode 1, because numbers are lies.

It's alive! It's alive!
"HYDRA Lives" begins… not where the last one left off, but on the S.H.I.E.L.D. helicarrier. Director Nick Fury (not the director for the episode, that’s Vinton Heuck; Fury’s the Director of S.H.I.E.L.D.) is epically standing on the bridge. Notably, he’s black, like Ultimate Nick Fury, but has but a soul patch and a crew cut; a far cry from Samuel L. Jackson’s portrayal of what is essentially himself. Anyway, he tells his second-in-command, Deputy Maria Hill, to give him an update. She tells him that they’re five minutes away from the HYDRA conflict.

Nick Fury: “That’s five minutes too long, Hill.”

Can you say something that’s not a cliché, Nick?

Maria then reports that Iron Man is on the scene, causing Nick to glare at the camera. With his single eye.

Nick "Grumpy Cat" Fury
When then cut to Iron Man, who is indeed on the scene, but is also getting his butt kicked by the Dreadnoughts. After some nifty-looking fighting, Iron Man gets tackled into the ground and a Dreadnought attempts to drill through Iron Man’s head. As this happens, JARVIS speaks up. As it turns out, he’d been analyzing the energy pattern of the Dreadnoughts’ weapons, and it seems that the robots have been upgraded with repulsor-blasters, one of Iron Man’s signature weapons.

Iron Man: “That’s my tech!”

Yeah, I just said that, Tony.

Iron Man: “HYDRA’s using my tech… against me?!”

Yeah. Welcome to the conversation; glad you could make it.

Iron Man knocks away the Dreadnought’s drill arm, and attempts an EMP. Unfortunately, there’s not enough power left in his batteries. So instead, he starts blasting away with his own repulsors. Unfortunately… again, the Dreadnoughts are equipped with Stark-tech shields as well. Quickly running out of power, he demands  anywaythat JARVIS reboot his shields while he takes on the robots.

Iron Man: “Come on, you pieces of junk; show me what else you got! ‘Cause you probably stole IT from me, too!”

Meanwhile, back at Stark Tower, Pepper’s worried about Tony.

Pepper: “He’s all alone out there against the people who stole his technology.”

Welcome to the conversation Pepper; everyone else left already.

Iron Man, meanwhile, manages to fend off the Dreadnoughts and their fire-breath, and rips out some Stark Industries technology out of one, before the last one standing attacks him some more. On a nearby building, a HYDRA goon wakes up, grabs a weapon, and takes aim at Iron Man… only for the HYDRA goon to be shot by another HYDRA goon.

2nd Goon: “Not yet…”

After more fighting, Iron Man takes out the final Dreadnought with a rocket boot to the face, and gets hit by the missiles from yet another Dreadnought. Thankfully, I don’t need to type yet another sentence about continued fighting, because S.H.I.E.L.D’s lasers rain down from the sky and blast it. The helicarrier arrives overhead, and they deploy their own armor-suited agents, known as “Mandroids.”

Mandroid: “Iron Man: By the authority of the Strategic Homeland Intervention Enforcement and Logistics Division, you are hereby ordered to stand down.”

"Stop resisting! Stop resisting!"
Back on the helicarrier, Hill asks Fury what his orders are. He raises an eyebrow…. And the Micro-Episode ends. Wouldn’t it be hilarious if that was misinterpreted, and Hill gave the order for the Mandroids to raise their eyebrows?

To be continued in Micro-Episode 6!

1 comment:

  1. That Dreadnought's drill is not going to be piercing the heavens anytime soon.

    - That One Anon