Hey! Peanut gallery! You still there?
|"He said he was going to skedaddle before you could ask to do a crossover for his upcoming Big Hero 6 review."|
|"Well, it's a long story that begins with the Unshaved Mouse's review of Snow White...."|
|"I was forced to sit through Foodfight. In that moment, I realized that I wouldn't truly be a master of animation until I had actually weaponized it."|
|"Thanks for being my guinea pig."|
|"And now that I've perfected the meaningless crossover, maybe now it can be a shining example of what not to do for countless generations?"|
|"A little from column A, a little from column B."|
First of all, can you imagine how the cast of Jessie reacted to being told that they were going to be on Ultimate Spider-Man?
|That's the reaction I'd expect.|
|These guys are off the hook. The writers, not so much.|
Ideally for the Disney Channel, this crossover would have the Jessie viewers start tuning into Ultimate Spider-Man, and vice-versa. But the way this episode is written, it would probably only appeal to people who are already a fan of both shows.
Heck, the animated Jessie barely looked like the live-action Jessie! Compare.
|Debby Ryan looks like God sculpted her not from clay, but from dimples.|
|Not a dimple in sight. Way to nail that likeness.|
Oh, and there's the elephant in the room. Jessie and Ultimate Spider-Man now exist in the same universe. So every time you watch Jessie (God help you), remember that Spider-Man is swinging around somewhere. But not only that, shows that take place in Jessie's shared universe (the Disney Live-Action Universe), like Wizards of Waverly Place, Mighty Med, The Suite Life of Zack and Cody, etc. apparently also take place in the Marvel Animated Universe, logically.
But let's take it a step further. If Girl Meets World is revealed to be in the same universe as Disney's other live-action shows, then that also links the Marvel Animated Universe to Boy Meets World. And from there, that links it into myriad crossovers that include The X-Files, Law and Order (and spinoffs), and Homicide: Life on the Street (all through shared character Detective John Munch).
But wait! There's more! You could connect Ultimate Spider-Man, though Jessie, potentially through Boy Meets World, into St. Elsewhere. You know, the show with the finale that revealed that the entire series, and therefore 90% of live-action TV (thanks to all those crossovers), took place in the head in the head of Tommy Westphall, an autistic child.
|Although this would explain Hulk and the Agents of S.M.A.S.H.|
|"I told you, Col. Prescott, I don't want to join your super-secret boy band."|
"No, you're thinking of JONAS."
|"Starting to sound like the Mouse."|
|"A bit of an experimental piece."|
|"You wish. With the Ultimate Spider-Man/Jessie crossover, I figured out how to ruin animation by putting live-action characters in it. And then I thought, what if I used live-action to ruin animation retroactively?"|
|"Nope. Check this out; they're the hip, sexy offspring of classic Disney villains. I call it 'Descendants.'"|
|Coming to the Disney Channel, 2015.|
|"My thoughts exactly. To me, my minions!"|
|"We hear and obey."|
|"And a Happy Halloween to all of you at home."|
See you next time!