Not, like, Frankensetin-style. It's not Halloween just yet. |
Tony: "Just say it. Say, 'Tony, I'm afraid of new tech!' Admitting you have a problem's always the first step."
Sneaking a reference in about Tony's former alcoholism? Nice.
Captain America: "Gosh, Mr. Big Brain! Your modern tech is so gol-darn confusing! How does this contraption turn water into coffee? Is it coal power or is it... a miracle?"
Okay, that was actually really funny. Can we please make "Sarcastic Captain America" a meme, internet?
Here's a picture to caption. Go nuts, internet. |
Hello, guy getting paid to impersonate Sam Rockwell. You're doing a good job. |
Captain America: "And he called you out on TV."
Iron Man: "And that."
The Avengers exit the Avenjet and decline Hammer's offer of mango iced tea. Suddenly, Iron Man gets knocked into the desert by a robot.
Hammer: "Meet the Super-Adaptoid, super hero of the future. It's time to put your metal where your mouth is, Iron Man."
After the titles, the Adaptoid quickly gets its butt kicked by all the Avengers, but not before it manages to scan them all with its sensors. The Avengers have had enough and leave, but not before Hulk takes Hammer's iced tea.
Hulk: "The next time you build something to attack us with... don't."
Hammer impotently yells that he's suing all of them, but they ignore him. But Cap still harbors some doubts.
Cap: "It's never that easy...."
As the Avengers fly away, Hammer's scowl quickly turns into a grin as his robot shapeshifts and reforms itself.
Hammer: "Ready for Phase Two."
"Letting the Avengers prepare for my upcoming assault. This was a good plan." |
Captain America: "Don't you think it's strange to spend billions on a robot just to let us crush it? Hammer can't be a complete idiot."
Tony: "Hammer is a complete idiot. Really. He's just a geek with armor envy."
Cap gets the data anyway and begins to go over it.
Tony: "If any of the math looks complicated, that's because it is."
A quick glance at the screen shows nothing but random equations. Like "A = Pi r2." Which is basic geometry.
Back at base, Cap finally figures out how to work his tablet computer with help from Falcon (in his defense, it's joystick operated, of all things), and they make a discovery.
Falcon: "Those are undifferentiated microclusters. Tiny machines-"
Captain America: "That can be repurposed in response to new programming."
...wha?
Captain America: "Futura. Never miss an issue."
Oh. All right, then. ...I guess.
Suddenly, BOOM.
The Super-Adaptoid, now boasting repulsor gauntlets, Falcon's wings, and Thor-ish armor plates has come to finish the job. And it wouldn't be complete without the Adaptoid's face broadcasting footage of Hammer.
"Plausible deniability? What's that?" |
Hammer-oid: "I feel like causing trouble. You feel like stopping me?"
A good chunk of the episode is then spent expositing that the Adaptoid can shapeshift, and then seeing it for ourselves. The Avengers fight the Adaptoid for a good while, while Cap tries to tell the others that they need to try something new. Anything they throw at the Super-Adaptoid simply gets returned.
It even returns high-fives, apparently. |
But Cap manages to launch the tower's Avenjet with himself and the Adaptoid inside of it. Unfortunately, as Iron Man points out, there's a big hole in the jet and they're headed into space. But thanks to a little bit of that old Captain America ingenuity, he manages to booby trap his shield, find an Iron Man helmet, and deliver a beatdown. Because while the Adaptoid may have copied all of the Avenger's tricks, Cap knows how to counter those same tricks. He knocks the Adaptoid out into space where it gets smashed by Thor and crashes to the ground before he gets rescued by Iron Man.
The fact that Iron Man leaves his old stuff everywhere was integral to the plan. |
Back at Avengers Tower, Cap gives Tony a Starkpad filled with his strategies.
Tony: "Hold on. I wanna take notes."
And the lesson of not over-relying on technology has been learned for the first time. Repetitions of the lesson to come ad nauseum.
Well, let's review. And it's about time that I gave a few things a piece of my mind! But to be fair, I do that for every episode.
"Apparently, Justin Hammer, one of the Iron Man 2 villains (imagine if Tony Stark was an evil doofus)"
ReplyDeleteNEWT! Imma gonna let you finish, but the plot for Captain America is gonna be Civil War. you won't have to imagine it, RDJ's gonna act it for you.
I think it could be both a powerful and HILARIOUS moment if Tony has a moment of reflection in the Civil War adaptation...
DeleteTony: "My God, I've turned into Justin Hammer."