|I'm sad, too.|
|Are they a team? Or are they a time bomb?|
|Geez, look at all that hair. Looks like Mandrill needs to manscape.|
|Because our brave men and women in uniform are the real heroes. The more you know.|
|In Brightest Day, in Blackest Night, this note is legal tender for all debts, public and private.|
Iron Man: “I say, ‘One down, seventy-three to go.’”
Man, they’ll have all the villains back in jail in a couple of episodes at this rate. After the theme song (My God I love hearing this theme song after weeks and weeks of the theme song-less Marvel Animated Universe. I don't care if I keep bringing it up, it keeps being true.), we cut to the docks where the Black Panther soon ends up beating the stuffing out of some dockworkers who are understandably upset that there was a stowaway on their freighter. So the first thing the Black Panther does after donning his father’s mantle is beat up some guys who, though they may be jerks, have a legitimate grievance. Our hero…?
The next day, Pepper Potts is in front of a mansion, thanking someone offscreen for being on time. The implication, of course, is that she’s talking to Tony. Hilariously, she’s talking to the Hulk. Even more hilariously, Hulk is the only Avenger who showed up on time. It’s almost enough to distract me from the fact that our villains for this episode are taking a casual stroll down the street.
|Seriously, points to the animators for sneaking them in.|
Well, that’s just rude.
Thor jovially greets the Hulk, too, who tells the Son of Asgard to get a watch. Then the Wasp arrives. Naturally, she blames Hank for being late. Thor is taken aback at the fact that Hank arrived in his Ant-Man form, because the Giant-Man form seems more useful. Welcome to about half the complaints about Ant-Man, Thor. But before Hank can list the merits of being smaller than an ant, the increasingly-impatient Hulk just wants to know where Iron Man is. Naturally, Iron Man shows up right on cue, having been a bit busy.
Iron Man: “I got caught up in a meeting. Actually, I missed that meeting, too. Anyway, thanks for coming and welcome to Avengers Mansion.”
He begins to talk about the building, but Hulk breaks down the gate and walks inside.
Iron Man: “You know, that was really rude.”
The rest of the Avengers enter as Tony explains that this was once part of the Maria Stark Foundation, but he’s upgraded it into a home base since the breakout. He explains that JARVIS, his AI butler, runs the house, then he takes him on a tour. First stop: the kitchen, where Hulk immediately starts pigging out as Wasp makes a face that she usually reserves for her boyfriend.
|The old "I'm not mad, I'm just disappointed" face.|
|I guess he doesn't really like it. If he did, he'd be smashing it and yelling for another.|
Thor: “Treat the lady with respect.”
Funny, considering your first words to her this episode, Thor.
Before a fight can break out, Tony activates the secret fireplace entrance and takes the team to the secret lower levels of the mansion where all kinds of cool things are. Labs, the armory, the vehicle hangar…. Basically, it’s the Batcave. Next, he shows them the training room. Wasp is the first to test it out, and the first thing it does is fire missile at her. I’m pretty sure OSHA would have a field day if they ever found out that Tony had a room that is designed to fire missiles at its occupants.
The rest of the Avengers dodge some hazards of their own, including the Hulk who ends up smashing quite a bit of the place.
Iron Man: “It’s self-repairing, thanks for asking.”
Finally, he shows them their meeting room and gets down to brass tacks. Seventy-four villains escaped. Only Graviton and Mandrill are accounted for. They’re going to need to work together to figure this out. Hulk stands in his own corner of the room, as Banner talks to him inside his head.
Bruce: “These…. ‘Avengers.’ Once they’re done using you, they’ll lock you up, too.”
Hulk: “This was your idea.”
Bruce: “Things have changed.”
Call me crazy, but something’s not quite right.
Wasp looks over at the big guy and politely waves at him. When Hulk doesn’t return the favor, she makes faces at him and pretends to ignore him. You know, the stuff she does to Hank, only as a joke this time. I know, I know, that’s the second time this Recap I’ve made that joke. Fine, I’ll try to only bring up her relationship with Hank when it’s actually important.
|But it’s just so easy to make these jokes, you know?|
Hulk: “At least one of you knows what they’re doing.”
But Thor can’t takes no more of the Hulk’s grumping and a fight nearly breaks out before Tony puts a stop to it.
|"Gentlemen, gentlemen, save it for Hulk Vs."|
Bruce: “It’s not me! Tell the other Avengers it’s not me! Hulk!”
Is anyone else getting flashbacks to the second episode of Avengers Assemble? Or flashforwards, I guess?
As Hulk leaves his room to deal with the situation, the reflection of Banner in the mirror turns into the real villain for the episode: The Enchantress. Dun dun dunnnn! Meanwhile, Hank Pym is working hard on tinkering with the head of one of his Ultron drones (which I’m sure won’t lead to anything bad happening) as Wasp flies up to talk to him.
Wasp: “You never listen to me.”
What a coincidence, you…. No, I’m going to try to restrain myself. I mean, dang it, I like the Wasp. I really do. I like the actress's performance, her cheerfulness, and her witty banter. And I like the fact that she and Hank have a relationship that has real-world problems instead of the typical solved-in-thirty-minutes TV fare. But man alive, does she rub me the wrong way sometimes. But on the other hand, I’d hate to turn every single Recap of this show into my personal whine-fest about Wasp.
But don’t worry. I’ve got an idea.
Every time I complain/snark about how Janet treats Hank, a quarter goes in. But if the complaining/snark goes on for a paragraph, that’s a dollar in the jar. And for every bolded sentence, that’s an extra dollar on top of whatever else that particular statement is worth.
And for extra incentive, I’m going to go all Ex Post Facto and make myself put some money in for all the times I’ve broken my new rules already. Let’s see, when you add together the Micro-Episodes/Compliations/Review, "Breakout" Part 1, Part 2 and the Review, "To Steal an Ant-Man," "Michael Korvac," and the stuff I said earlier in this Recap....
|So that’s $8 into the jar already. Uh-oh.|
Hank: “Look, I applaud the idea, but just because Iron Man says we’re a team doesn’t make it so.”
Actually, that’s a fair point. But Janet has a good point, too. They have superpowers. And with great power, comes the need to kick supervillain butt.
Hank: “We’re five strangers. It takes time to form a team. It takes trust.”
Wasp: “I wonder where Thor slept before now. Does he even sleep?”
Oh, yeah, Hank's the one who doesn’t listen here.
|Well, there’s another quarter.|
The Hulk causes panic by simply walking through the city before Thor flies up and tells him to come back to Avengers Mansion. Soon enough, fists are exchanged as, back at Stark Tower, Nick Fury tells Tony why he likes the idea of Avengers. Simply put, the idea of a vigilante team running around makes some people uneasy. That’s a good thing. Easier to sniff out betrayal in the upper ranks that way. So Nick Fury will help the Avengers under the table in any way he can. But Tony knows that this means owing Fury some “favors” down the line.
Nick Fury: “You take the good with the bad.”
Pepper tells Tony about the big, green problem, and Tony puts in the call.
Tony: “Avengers, assemble.”
Thor and Hulk are fighting in the park when the Wasp shows up and asks Hulk to calm down.
Wasp: “We’re not attacking you!”
Right after she says this, Thor attacks him. So, uh… nice teamwork there, guys.
Iron Man flies in to stop the Hulk, but JARVIS detects some kind of odd energy signature around the Hulk’s brain. And it’s not the usual Gamma radiation, it’s similar to the energy field surrounding Thor’s hammer. It’s magic.
Giant-Man soon arrives to get his very own smackdown from the Hulk as an all-out fight breaks out. Hulk claps the Wasp between his hands. Just as he prepares to smash, Bruce Banner musters the strength to break free of his mental chains and shake off the Hulk’s mind control. Hulk leaps away, and before you can say “Well, that went well,” Iron Man gets an axe to the chest.
Enchantress: “You’d better hope someone more capable chooses to avenge you.”
|Her henchman might have the weirdest tan line I've ever seen, but the man gets results.|
Bruce: “You have to go back.”
Bruce tells him that the Enchantress wanted to split Hulk from the Avengers. Because that was the place he could do the most good. Meanwhile, Wasp and Giant-Man rejoin the fray. But even so, the fight goes poorly. Before the Executioner can decapitate Giant-Man, Hulk returns for Round 2, breaking the Enchantress’s concentration and releasing Thor’s hammer and the Wasp from their bonds. Thor brings the thunder down, recharging Iron Man’s broken armor and tipping the odds in the heroes’ favor. Enchantress tries her mind voodoo again, but that just makes the Hulk angry. The Enchantress is soon knocked out, and the Executioner grabs her and escapes through a portal with her.
The day is saved, and Thor congratulates Hulk for the impressive amount of willpower it took to end up resisting the Enchantress. But Hulk wants none of it. He saw how willing the Avengers were to try and subdue him.
Hulk: “You’re no different from Ross and S.H.I.E.L.D. Except they’re honest about it.”
|"I'm gonna go make my own team. With my cousin. And two other Hulks! Three, if something bad ever happens to Ross..."|
So, yeah. The Hulk ragequit after a single episode. Was this too sudden of a development? Was this inevitable? Let's take a look.