I looked at the clock again. 3:36.
With nothing better to do, I cracked my knuckles and got to work.
|While also wishing I had something better to do.|
|A slider puzzle.|
3:50 PM. The slider puzzle sat before me. Solved.
|And my reward was a glitchy “You Win!” screen. One step up from a "congladuration."|
Harley: “She had legs. Legs that started in New Jersey and ended up here.”
"What’s Elastigirl doing here?" I typed. I allowed myself a chuckle. This episode was going to be a gold mine. As far as Gotham Girls goes, anyway.
Harley: “In that litter box known as Gotham City.”
Shoot, I thought. I forgot to empty the litter boxes last night. I shook my head as I thought about how much poop the new kitten proved himself capable of making. Vowing to do it after I was done recapping, I continued to watch.
Catwoman: “It’s Velma.”
Harley: “She said.”
Catwoman: “You have to find her.”
Harley: “’Velma’? Somebody already wrote that one, cat. And it don’t end happily.”
My fingers paused over the keys. Obviously, it was a reference to Farewell, My Lovely by Raymond Chandler. But I didn’t know if my audience would get it if I followed that up with a reference to that book. Heck, I didn’t even know if my dad would get a reference that old. After making a note to probably make a Scooby-Doo joke instead, I continued to watch.
In overdone noir dialogue, Catwoman described Velma. Long story short: she’s a cat. Big surprise.
Catwoman offered Harley all she had left for this job: a squeaky mouse toy.
|Her favorite one, probably.|
Batgirl: “Velma? Used to see an orange tabby around here went by that name. Mangy thing. Had to run ‘er in for vagrancy.”
Harley: “No. Calico. Gold eyes. Might be a runaway. Might be lookin’ to score some catnip.”
|Hello, blatant drug joke in the DCAU.|
Harley concluded that the coppers weren’t going to help her, so she set off on her own. Next, she questioned Poison Ivy, who denied everything without even looking.
Poison Ivy: “Seen one, seen ‘em all.”
Harley: “Sounds like you got a beef against cats.”
Ivy complained that the cats moving into the neighborhood ruined her plants by using them as a litter box.
Poison Ivy: “They’re poison, I tell ya. Poison.”
Takes one to know one, I typed.
|Ivy, you still make the best faces.|
|What flavor is that ice cream supposed to be? Mildew?|
Harley: “It’s an old story, cat. You been dumped for a guy with a can of tuna.”
Catwoman: “Where is she?”
Harley: “Sorry, not part of the deal. I told her you were lookin’ for her. She knows where you live, the rest is up to her.”
But the pictures of Velma and her new family brought a smile to Catwoman’s face. And Velma Jr. as a present from Velma Sr. helped, too.
Harley: “See? Anyone can write this stuff.”
Catwoman: “Speak for yourself, Shakespeare.”
And with that, the webisode ended. I got up and headed downstairs. There were a couple of little furballs I needed to see.
|And I had to clean their litter boxes, too.|
Look, deep storytelling really isn't Gotham Girls's thing. So in the end, the big question is whether or not the webisode was any fun. And this one definitely was. I’m a sucker for noir, and this was a nice little spoof on the genre with a cute framing device.
(Also, this episode just happened to go up on 9/11. Not making a joke about that.)
Next time, things get even cuter as Harley starts up a gang of little girls. See you then!